On February 3, 2008, I lost my best friend, my confidant, my supporter and biggest cheerleader. I lost someone who loved me unconditionally no matter the mistakes I made. I lost my mom. As it gets closer to the anniversary of her death the more I think about her. And with that thinking comes all the thoughts that seem to make me sad and wonder why she put up with me.
I keep asking myself was I a good daughter. Was there more I could have done the weekend she passed away? Why didn't I call her the two times I felt God prompting me to check on her. I know deep down that there was nothing I could do to prevent her from passing away. I also know that she is in a much better place and is once again whole and not in pain or suffering.
I realize now that I have been stuck in a place where I blamed myself for not doing more to prevent my mom's death. Even if I had called her those two times would there really had been anything I could have done. I believe God was calling my mom home to be with him. Her body was tired and she had been through so much healthwise.
As the February 3rd comes closer, I choose to cherish the memories of my mom and am thankful that she is no longer in pain and is watching down over me. If you knew my mom I would love it if you would be willing to share a memory you have had with her.
